• Brains

    10 Dating Red Flags You Should Never Ignore

    Most singles understand the concept of Dating Red Flags and that when you see them in a possible partner you should run for the hills. That being said, far too many singles fail to either understand what red flags are important to never ignore or, make the choice to overlook them and continue onward like some bikini-clad sunbather walking into a blizzard. In my Conscious Dating Programs, I teach my clients about the importance of quickly identifying and reacting to the key dating red flags so you spend less time with Mr. Wrong and more time on your hunt for Mr. Right.

    1. Lack of communication skills – The leading cause for divorce is not just infidelity, rather it stems from a lack of communication between partners. If you are dating someone and they are not able properly to convey their feelings or what they want from you or out of life, then you have a red flag of the highest order.

    2. Actions don’t match words – It’s easy for someone to tell you they love you, but it’s much harder to show. Pay attention to the details of what the person across from you says and then match it against their actions. For example, if he says he plans to introduce you to someone special in his life or take you to that place you always wanted to go and never does, then clearly the actions don’t match the words.

    3. Poor relationships with others – Good relationship skills are no exclusive to romantic relationships. Pay attention to how your potential partner treats his family, friends, even co-workers. If you see lots of volatility there, most likely you can expect the same for your relationship.

    4. Financial instability – Here I am not talking about men who don’t have a lot of money, instead, I want you to look at things like how he spends and saves money. Before I got into a serious relationship with my husband I asked my husband to show me his credit score. That score and the way I saw him handle his money in life to make me feel comfortable moving on in the relationship.

    5. Jealous or controlling behavior – So many of my clients come to me after ignoring this red flag. The reason is often that they confused their former partner’s jealousy and control with love and passion. Unfortunately, ignoring this red flag can be a gateway for you to end up in an abusive relationship.

    6. Lack of accountability – When you are vulnerable in your life, you take accountability for your actions and you accept your flaws. For those who enter into a relationship with someone who lacks taking accountability, it can be a maddening trip down a one-way street where your partner feels they never do anything wrong and are hurting you is just the cost of doing business.

    7. They don’t bring out the best in you – A relationship is not something you should be looking for, a “good” relationship is, however. Good relationships are ones where both you and your partner bring out the best in each other. If you are dating someone and you look in the mirror and don’t like what you see, it’s time to ask why.

    8. Your gut just tells you something is wrong – This is the most important red flag of them all. No matter what it is that you see

    in someone that causes you to pause, definitely do not ignore it. Your gut is there for a reason, to protect you from getting hurt. So, by all means, listen to it when it speaks to you. Not only will it help you in your dating life, but it will also help you in life in general.

    9. Lack of thoughtfulness – May studies have been done that indicate that when couples do at least one thoughtful thing for their partner in a day their relationship lasts longer. This can be anything from an unexpected text saying, “I am thinking of you” to taking you to a café just because you once mentioned always wanting to go. Thoughtfulness doesn’t need to be there at every turn, but when it’s never there you know what color the flag is.

    10. Your Non-negotiables are not met – All of the 9 red flags above can be elements of your dating life that can be tested against your Non-negotiables. These are also known as deal-breakers and are a big part of my Conscious Dating Program. They are not superficial things like someone is too short or drives a crappy car, rather are key core values that you must have in a relationship or the relationship will fail every time. That’s right every time, they are just that powerful. To learn more about Non-negotiables and how to get yours go to www.amiethedatingcoach.com.

    Amie Leadingham is a Master Certified Relationship Coach. Her relationship coaching and mentoring support have helped singles from around the world find their life partner.  Her greatest accomplishments come from seeing her clients find lasting love, get married, and create their own family.

    Her dedication and passion have led Amie to be named one of LA’s “Best Dating Coaches” by Dating Advice and named one of LA’s Most Inspiring Story from Voyage LA Magazine.  Amie has been featured in a variety of media outlets including the CBS Network, Fox 5 News, People Entertainment Weekly Channel, HelloGiggles TV, Zoosk, Martha Stewart Weddings. 

    She is the author of “A Women’s Handbook to Online Dating.” Grab her free eBook, 5 Dating Traps Keeping You Single.

    Helping you take charge of your love life!

    Amie Leadingham

    Master Certified Relationship Coach

    Email: al@amiethedatingcoach.com

    Website: www.amiethedatingcoach.com

    “Everything you’ve ever wanted is on the other side of fear.” – George Addair

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  • Beauty

    Shop for women’s clothing fashions on Amazon? Really?

    Who doesn’t love Amazon?  I often feel guilty when purchasing from this jugger knot of a corporation because I worry that it is putting the smaller mom & pop boutiques out of business.  I watched Sleepless in Seattle and cheered for Meg Ryan’s children’s bookstore to survive the evil onslaught of the corporate giant.  But even Meg, in the end, had to give up and give in to the changing times.

    I’ve never really enjoyed shopping as an activity.  I remember being in High School and girlfriends clamoring for mom’s to drop us off for a Saturday at the mall.  Somehow I could never relate to their shopping bliss.  While I would watch girlfriends spend what felt like DAYS digging through every rack and trying on endless outfits, twittering about what looked best, I was bored out of my skull.  My idea of shopping is to walk through a store in a single pass & if something pops out like a fabric, pattern, color, etc., I might stop and peak but otherwise, I could be in and out within the time span of about 5 minutes and ready to go grab a lemonade & hotdog on a stick.

    Even today, when my fiance’ needs a new pair of pants or a shirt, he clamors to spend a day walking and shopping, trying on outfits, modeling them for me, and asking if his ass looks good in whatever pants he is trying on.  I’m a little more okay with this nowadays because a lot of the men’s stores have comfy chairs and serve cocktails.  Fine, I’ll shop with you if I can sit and have someone bring me free whiskey neat, please.

    So with the show taping around the corner, I realized my wardrobe was sadly lacking.  I really needed to pick up a few jewel-colored blouses (the colors work well on camera) but was really unsure where I was going to even find the time to look.  My closet has become increasingly full of white t-shirts, jeans, sneakers and some simple black wardrobe pieces that allow me to travel with only one to two pairs of shoes.  Checking a bag costs money these days and I avoid it as much as possible.

    We have a few boutiques right by our local grocery store so I popped in to see what I could find.  Everything seemed overpriced and trying clothes on meant breaking a sweat & walking out with my hair looking like I had just participated in a salacious role in the sack in the back room.  No such luck actually.  Sex in a dressing room is still on the bucket list though.

    Frustrated I decided to see if I could just pick up something online.  I typed in jewel-colored women’s blouse and scrolled through pictures of tops that either was a fit for my niece or a grandmother but nothing that really appealed to a woman in between (unless I  wanted to spend a pretty penny on a high-end luxury item).  Not in the budget.

    I ran across a few sites that were filled with amazing pictures of fashionable pieces being worn by 6′ tall gorgeous models.  I actually put a few in the cart and almost checked out before I stopped to do a quick consumer review check on the sites.  It was quickly apparent that what was being showcased and what I was going to receive was vastly different.  Most of the reviews were 1 star out of 5 and the only reason for the one-star was because zero wasn’t an option.  While I love a good joke, I don’t have time to order stuff that is going to show up with one sleeve longer than another, armholes that cut off your circulation, or fabrics that scratch at your skin or are completely see-through.

    So my next step was to Google best online clothing shops for women on a budget.  Again, it would seem that most of the budget-friendly options were targeted to younger women that were looking to buy the latest trendy fashions.  Just not my demographic any longer.

    Then I came across a blog that rated Amazon in the top 10 best places to shop for women’s fashion clothing.  Amazon?  Really?

    Here is what I loved about the Amazon shop experience:

    1. Tons of options
    2. Amazon makes it incredibly easy to keyword search for exactly what you are looking for saving lots of time
    3. They let you filter out advertisers who have low consumer star rating reviews
    4. Cheap, cheap, cheap.  Who doesn’t love a bargain?
    5. Quick delivery on most items.
    6. Easy returns

    Best of all?  Real women’s review & pictures!  While a top might have looked stunning in the ad photos the fact that you can click on the items reviews and see what was actually delivered, tried on by an average woman who maybe isn’t model tall & thin, see it in real light (not the fancy stuff they use to shoot those ads) was everything!  Plus, those size charts don’t work half the time.  I dumped things from the cart easily after looking at consumer pictures or ordered a completely different size than I normally would based on the pics and reviews women were posting.

    This is my kind of shopping!  Easy.

    All in all, I purchased three tops for a total spend of $66.97.  In my book that equates to buy 1 and get 2 free!

    In the meantime what do you think?  Will this new shop venture be a big win or am I about to get a box of cheaply made goods out of China that won’t be anywhere close to show worthy for next week?

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  • About

    Welcome!

    Hey there, what a crazy year it’s been! I’ve been through it all – facing my fears, embracing change, and making a gutsy decision to take control of my life. I mean, I even had the courage to ditch a high-paying job that made me miserable, cashed out my 401k, and invest in myself.

    But let me tell you, right after making that daring move, I totally freaked out and panicked! I ended up signing myself up to see a psychiatrist, questioning my own sanity. Like, what had I just done?

    Now, I’m new to therapy, so I didn’t want to show up without a clear purpose or goals in mind. I could totally picture myself sitting on this comfy couch, sweating and stuttering when asked, “So, why are you here today?” Time ticking away, money slipping through my fingers. Not exactly how I wanted to start a session with someone who charges by the hour.

    So, I did some soul-searching before the first appointment. I asked myself some tough questions:

    • Where am I letting fear control my life and hold me back?
    • What negative thoughts are stopping me from reaching my full potential?
    • How can I change my mindset and create the life I truly desire?

    And wow, it hit me hard. Fear and negativity were consuming my every move. I had zero energy, stuck in a job that wasn’t fulfilling, constantly feeling inadequate. As a mother, doubts consumed me. Hanging out with friends started feeling like a chore. And failure? Oh my, it terrified me. I realized I wasn’t living up to my true strength and self-worth.

    Oh, and let’s not even talk about social media! The constant stream of people showcasing their perfect lives left me feeling like I was drowning in shallow water.

    I desperately craved genuine, heart-to-heart connections. I wanted to learn from other women’s journeys and be uplifted, carried upstream past all the fear, towards my best life. Surely, I couldn’t be the only one feeling this way.

    That’s when Beauty Brains Bubbly came to life! And guess what? I’m inviting you to join me on this extraordinary journey. Let’s create a safe space where women can have honest conversations, share impactful stories, and truly make a difference. Together, let’s dive in headfirst, tackle those hush-hush topics, and be open and vulnerable. We’ll share all the tips and tricks for living our best lives, making sure no one ever feels alone in their struggles. And hey, let’s find humor and joy in facing life’s challenges head-on and embrace our mistakes and failures as evidence that we took chances!

    I’m ready to grow, and I want you to come along for the ride. Are you in? Let’s inspire each other, take risks, and remember that none of us are ever alone.

    Our journey is a badge of honor, my friend, so let’s make the most of it.

    Cheers,

    Deb

  • Beauty

    Get that under-eye concealer away from me and bring in PCA skin’s sheer tint eye!

    I work full-time as an actress here in Los Angeles. Every once in a while I get booked on a job and introduced to a new product that ends up being a staple in my home. PCA skin is one of those lines that is now a must-have in my personal skincare routine.

    I take a lot of their stuff with me now on every shoot I book and when the make-up artist starts coming at my under eyes with concealer and powder I JUMP up, grab my bag and hand them my PCA skin Sheer Tint Eye.

    At my age, concealer and powder under my eyes = WRINKLE INTENSIFICATION NIGHTMARE!

    There is so much pressure these days to get shot up with injections and fillers to fight the aging process but as an actress, I need my face to move, and why not find ways to age gracefully and naturally.

    Once the make-up artists get their hands on this stuff they end up taking pictures of the tube and ordering it for themselves on-line. I can only hope that some other mature actress will get the benefit of them pulling this out on their shoot and leaving all the clumpy, cakey other stuff for the younger gals who can handle that kind of thing.

    I’ve had other actresses on set come up and ask to try the product and always get the same excited reaction ‘where on earth did you get this’?!

    The PCA Sheer Tint Eye doesn’t replace my daily under-eye serum but I use it over the top to protect against UVA/UVB rays, its long-wearing and formulated to minimize the appearance of the fine lines, wrinkles, dark circles, and puffiness. The best part…it is tinted!!!! I generally wear this stuff with NO concealer and NO make-up or powder over the top because it provides just enough coverage and doesn’t accentuate the signs of aging.

    They carry a ton of amazing products and I promise to share some other fantastic stuff from their line in future posts. In the meantime, you can find them at https://www.pcasking.com/ and they offer FREE shipping on your first order. Let me know if you try this product and love it as much as I do!

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