10 Dating Red Flags You Should Never Ignore

Most singles understand the concept of Dating Red Flags and that when you see them in a possible partner you should run for the hills. That being said, far too many singles fail to either understand what red flags are important to never ignore or, make the choice to overlook them and continue onward like some bikini-clad sunbather walking into a blizzard. In my Conscious Dating Programs, I teach my clients about the importance of quickly identifying and reacting to the key dating red flags so you spend less time with Mr. Wrong and more time on your hunt for Mr. Right.

1. Lack of communication skills – The leading cause for divorce is not just infidelity, rather it stems from a lack of communication between partners. If you are dating someone and they are not able properly to convey their feelings or what they want from you or out of life, then you have a red flag of the highest order.

2. Actions don’t match words – It’s easy for someone to tell you they love you, but it’s much harder to show. Pay attention to the details of what the person across from you says and then match it against their actions. For example, if he says he plans to introduce you to someone special in his life or take you to that place you always wanted to go and never does, then clearly the actions don’t match the words.

3. Poor relationships with others – Good relationship skills are no exclusive to romantic relationships. Pay attention to how your potential partner treats his family, friends, even co-workers. If you see lots of volatility there, most likely you can expect the same for your relationship.

4. Financial instability – Here I am not talking about men who don’t have a lot of money, instead, I want you to look at things like how he spends and saves money. Before I got into a serious relationship with my husband I asked my husband to show me his credit score. That score and the way I saw him handle his money in life to make me feel comfortable moving on in the relationship.

5. Jealous or controlling behavior – So many of my clients come to me after ignoring this red flag. The reason is often that they confused their former partner’s jealousy and control with love and passion. Unfortunately, ignoring this red flag can be a gateway for you to end up in an abusive relationship.

6. Lack of accountability – When you are vulnerable in your life, you take accountability for your actions and you accept your flaws. For those who enter into a relationship with someone who lacks taking accountability, it can be a maddening trip down a one-way street where your partner feels they never do anything wrong and are hurting you is just the cost of doing business.

7. They don’t bring out the best in you – A relationship is not something you should be looking for, a “good” relationship is, however. Good relationships are ones where both you and your partner bring out the best in each other. If you are dating someone and you look in the mirror and don’t like what you see, it’s time to ask why.

8. Your gut just tells you something is wrong – This is the most important red flag of them all. No matter what it is that you see

in someone that causes you to pause, definitely do not ignore it. Your gut is there for a reason, to protect you from getting hurt. So, by all means, listen to it when it speaks to you. Not only will it help you in your dating life, but it will also help you in life in general.

9. Lack of thoughtfulness – May studies have been done that indicate that when couples do at least one thoughtful thing for their partner in a day their relationship lasts longer. This can be anything from an unexpected text saying, “I am thinking of you” to taking you to a café just because you once mentioned always wanting to go. Thoughtfulness doesn’t need to be there at every turn, but when it’s never there you know what color the flag is.

10. Your Non-negotiables are not met – All of the 9 red flags above can be elements of your dating life that can be tested against your Non-negotiables. These are also known as deal-breakers and are a big part of my Conscious Dating Program. They are not superficial things like someone is too short or drives a crappy car, rather are key core values that you must have in a relationship or the relationship will fail every time. That’s right every time, they are just that powerful. To learn more about Non-negotiables and how to get yours go to www.amiethedatingcoach.com.

Amie Leadingham is a Master Certified Relationship Coach. Her relationship coaching and mentoring support have helped singles from around the world find their life partner.  Her greatest accomplishments come from seeing her clients find lasting love, get married, and create their own family.

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